heart warmness

wether so cold more cold than all past years we just int decmber and its like all people wearing all clothes they have ilike winter ido like it its better than hot stucky summer that makes me want get out of my own skin but ifeel so cold like frezzing inever feelt like that before ijust drink 2 glasses of hot nescaffe but no use ifeel so cold imust get under some heavy blanket oh the coldness still the same imust find away for warmness maybe some window is open and it gives that coldness itry follow where the cold come from and checked all the crom it was all closed fully locked like treasury iwas like injured lion in cage cant escape and just waiting for his destiny icollapse down surrendring and accept the coldness that ifeel with one hope that some mircle come and give me warmness again.suddenly ifind wheres the souce of that coldness it was so neer to me it was stuckin to me it was my heart oh i almost forget it but now he remind me by painfull way remind me by emanating the coldness in me itouch it feelt it find it like piece of ice why and how he is working like that how he makes me stay alive and living day by day do all past time he is like that? or thats new idont know but all iknow its so painfull bearly ican stand it.what make it like that and why whats his reasons and where iget feelings from if the heart frezzing?oh icant find feeling ilost it iremember now ilost my feeling in the crowded market of feelings yeh ilost them there and cant find them again this life is big market have everything u imagin and u cant imagin.so please anyone in this market find my feeling bring it back to me it be great favor for hopless man like methen iwant know why my heart frzzing is coz he build dreams and wakeup on reality ?is't coz he didnt fullfil any of his wishes or is't coz he is single bird cant reach his mate coz his mate want another bird want someone else yeh it could be this heart like heron bird sings while he dying.imust check it now ifeel the end is neer and ineed to feel all of me still here idont want lose anything even ilost everything already.iclosed my eyes and my hand sneaking slowly to my chest and try to find my hert pulse but cant find any pulse ok thats not big dealing it's appears that ilost allot more than ithought imust recall my medical info wheres the heart place itink its little lifter on the chest yeh my finger find soft spot it must be there and my fingers make there way in the skin trying to catch that runaway heart but they go deep and depper and cant find anything yeh its the place iknow my fingers there inside my chest and can even touch and hold my artery the heart artery but theres no heart theres space there the heart someone take it from his place and left his artery crying on him crying by blood coz there no tears my heart gone he gone when u broke it and smash it to invisible pieces so no heart any more and the space that gives me the coldness.........but he left me something the only thing is left for me he left me ur name engraved in that space engraved so deep and even time cant efface it from there he left me ur name and last words beside it ilove u forever and cant live without u my only love in my life
please give me back my heart warmness