into the ocean

I'm just a normal boy
That sank when I fell overboard
My ship would leave the country
But I'd rather swim ashore


Without a life vest, I'd be stuck again
Wish I was much more masculine
Maybe then I could learn to swim
Like 'fourteen miles away'

Now floating up and down
I spin, colliding into sound
Like whales beneath me diving down
I'm sinking to the bottom of my
Everything that freaks me out
The lighthouse beam has just run out
I'm cold as cold as cold can bebe


I want to swim away but don't know how
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean
Let the waves up take me down
Let the hurricane set in motion (yeah)
Let the rain of what I feel right now...come down
Let the rain come down


Where is the coastguard
I keep looking each direction
For a spotlight, give me something
I need something for protection
Maybe flotsam junk will do just fine
The jetsam sunk, I'm left behindI'm treading for my life believe me
(How can I keep up this breathing)


Not knowing how to think
I scream aloud, begin to sink
My legs and arms are broken down
With envy for the solid ground
I'm reaching for the life within me
How can one man stop his ending
I thought of just your face
Relaxed, and floated into space


I want to swim away but don't know how
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean
Let the waves up take me down
Let the hurricane set in motion (yeah)
Let the rain of what I feel right now...come down
Let the rain come down


Now waking to the sun
I calculate what I had done
Like jumping from the bow (yeah)
Just to prove I knew how (yeah)
It's midnight's late reminder of
The loss of her, the one I love
My will to quickly end it all
So thought no end my need to fall

Into the ocean, end it all
Into the ocean, end it all
Into the ocean, end it all
into the ocean, end it all


Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)


I want to swim away but don't know how
Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean
Let the waves up take me down
Let the hurricane set in motion (yeah)
Let the rain of what I feel right now...come down
Let the rain come down


Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
(In to space)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)
(I thought of just your face)
Into the ocean (goodbye) end it all (goodbye)

only you

Only you can make this world seem right
Only you can make the darkness bright.
Only you and you alone
can thrill me like you do
and fill my heart with love for only you.

Only you can make this change in me,
for it's true, you are my destiny.
When you hold my hand,
I understand the magic that you do.
You're my dream come true,
my one and only you.

Only you can make this change in me,
for it's true, you are my destiny.
When you hold my hand,
I understand the magic that you do.
You're my dream come true,
my one and only you.
One and only you.

9/11spical view(4)

after hetler and nazism.u.s.a make soviet and comminzm is the enemy and make all people affried of that.but after soviet union collapse u.s.a dont have enemy so they must make enemy so they try with china and south korea but people didnt convinced that the enemy.so u.s.a start new enemy mysterious enemy no one there know much about that enemy.the new enemy is islam.and islamofobia started everyone is affried of islam and muslims and u.s.a policy find it perfect issue to controll the mind of people by it.icant deny we must blame muslims to on that coz they didnt show the people out there the islamic religion how much he is peacefull and full of human intrests and great values the real world need it now but also the people out there didnt search of the truth and let the leaders of there countrys play in there minds and putt whatever they want in it.after the full aid from u.s.a to isreal against all billion muslim and after the amercan stand against everything islamic.muslims know that u.s.a treats them by double standerd spicaly with the oil in middle east and welth out there and show of how u.s.a is so greedy of it.then now u.s.a is officily enemy for muslims chasing them in every place with ready accusitions even with things they never do.after lebnon war in 1982 and the amercan roll in it and after they give iraq the green light to occupied kuwitt then the start getoff iraq all muslims know the amercan game that country after country in 90's muslims start and want take any situation of u.s.a spicaly after the explosion in oklahoma the ready accuse was muslim do it and after awhile it show that amercan citizen who do it and not muslim at all he was belonging to amercan groub.but did that clearing islam no u.s.a still make muslims is the enemy and now the arabian countrys people see that u.s.a is supporting the bad leaders of there countrys and in same the leaders obey u.s.a in everything its like the white house who lead the arabian countrys with no care of the unjastice and subdual who people see and letting isreal do whatever she do without any resbonsbility on it.now u.s.a do whatever she do in 1996 u.s.a fight planes attackes sudan by justified that theres factory for lethal weapons and they destroy it but all world discover it was factory for medcins and attacking afganstan too in same time to destroy tterriost camps but who die in it.kids and womens and old mens.alqaeda was raising this time youth muslim mens who is saw there islamic world rolled by u.s.a and there governments take orders from u.s.a and islamic countrys lives in poor and injustice and they saw how that muslims all arouand the world in accusing cage and how humiliation they see and one reason for that is u.s.a policy and ofcourse isreal is behinde some can say why muslims hate isreal is't only coz isreal occupied palstine and killed thousnad and emigrat millions of the palstnian?well thats is agood reason but theres something else that isreal attackes another 4 countrys before.egypt.syria.lebnon.jordan.in the isrealian hetage they want there country from the nail(egypt)till alfrorat(iraq)thats the big isreal they want and u.s.a policy is always beside isreal in whtever they do.so the main reason for muslims to hate u.s.a policy is isreal that plus another few reason how u.s.a want the welth of petrolum in arabian countrys and how they against everything islamic and how they support bad arabian governments.so all that is enough reason to make resistance against u.s.a and alqaeda start that.some of them have militry skills and some was fighters against soviet union in afganstan.so they qualifaid to face u.s.a.all what im trying to say that the true gulity is the u.s.a herself no one else but what the u.s.a policy through this years and like they say what u well sowing u well harvest. who sow evil he wel harvest evil.u.s.a always treats other countrys that they r less than amercans and all can remember whats happin to the original citzens how they treated them .so what u.s.a do all this years she harvest now.and not only muslims who hate u.s.a policy last statistics say that more than 83% of all world people hate u.s.a policy .always u.s.a accuse other by terror but more than 78% think that u.s.a is the biggest denger on the world peace.so anyone before he blame others and accuse other he must say that to u.s.a coz everything happin in this world u can find fingerprint say made in u.s.a

9/11spical view(3)

so the cold war was all over the world in rouands some u.s.a won and some soviets won and all the damge comes on the innocent people anyway since the time u.s.a start aid isreal with everything and makes isreal her first ally arab countrys start hate u.s.a not the country just hate the policy that always against arabian rights even in united nation the amercan veto was always ready to help isrealeven if the whole world was against isreal but always u.s.a protect him the far that u.s.a use the veto right in united nation about 37or38 times for isreal sake anyway after egypt defete isreal in 1973 war and allknow what u.s.a done with isreal till she almost involved in the war not officily ofcourse the amercan policy was unbelivable all in isreal side all against arab and muslims rights even in peace agreement betwen egypt and isreal u.s.a try putt all pressure on the egyptian side.after few years isreal attackes another arabian country lebnon and the amercan roll was so obvious again even after that u.s.a send amercan solders there amercan marines but she retreat them in humliting view when sucider boomb his car in marines building kills hundred of marines.but isrealian crimes that u.s.a coverd there still witness on them.in another cercle of the cold war but now in eroupe in east eroupe the comminust countrys there u.s.a succes that he penetrate deeply in it till he succes to make the mutiny the comminzm system and that was hard beat to soviets.and in another place now more east till afganstan soviet union occupied this poor country to help the comminust people there to roll and afganstanian start to fight the soviets and u.s.a find it great chance to bayback what soviets do with vietnames against amercan so u.s.a aid the afganian fighters till they give soviets degrading defete makes the collapse of soviet union come faster coz those fighters fight the great army with his tanks and planes and ships only with his reffles and his faith.after little years soviet union collapse and the great soviet power vanish and u.s.a stays alone on the stage the only power.so the cold war finished already and now the only magnate is u.s.a.the secret word betwen u.s.a and arabs is isreal.the unbliveable aid and pickup from u.s.a to isreal was the moving power for muslims to hate u.s.a policy but theres another reason too so important that u.s.a always support the dectatoring systems in arabs country even against the people .example like how much u.s.a support sadam in iraq in the 80's and help him even against his own nation and ignore all his crimes coz he was working with there intrest and in war with iran the enemy of u.s.a.and allot of this things coz almost all arabian countrys rolled by dectatorians taking there orders from the white house even its against there people.and this is the second reason.3rd reason we must go back to the theory of the illusionary enemy.

9/11spical view(2)

before the isrealian declare there country isrealian gangs start there massacrates against the arabs to force them to live there land this gangs was aragon and haganah was the biggest gangs in it the killd allot of innocent people men kids and womens without mercy and resualt of this massacrates allot of people left there land and escape by there lives to another and the gangs make big succes in that after declaring isreal country that gangs become the army of isreal in 1948 was the declare of isrealian country u.s.a and soviet union was almost neutrals in this mattre and england and france was the official sponsers for isreal and helping and so on.till 1956 when egypt nationalize the canal of suez and was england and france have stocks in the canal so they decided to attacke egypt to controll the canal but they need reason to attacke to occupied the canal so they find in isreal perfect ally in that and secret agreement betwen ben jorion prime minister of isreal and antony iden prime minister of england and molieae prime minister of france.that isreal attackes egypt till the suez canal and that happind then england and france give both countrys warning to keep away of the canal then the war starts and 3 armys unit togther against the egyptian army heres the u.s.a and soviet union roll start the give warning to the 3 countrys to stop there attacke against egypt and this force thim to stop.so it was great thing even the give this warning only coz this war start without the 3 countrys take apremission from u.s.a and soviet union so they didnt sstop the war love for peace or for the sake of innocent people blood anyway.so isreal start the first clash with arabian countrys and the 2 biggest country takes bigger situation after few years the official sponser of isreal become the u.s.a and isreal her first ally.and this roll show up in 1967 when isreal attackes and occupied places in 3 countrys in egypt and syria and jorden and occupied all of palstinian country.in this war u.s.a aid isreal with everything money weapons even with troops.and ofcourse isreal won this war and take allot of land and occupied it.the soviet union takes the arab countrys`side but not same as u.s.a with isreal.in same time another war in another place was runing war or vietnam but this time was officialy u.s.a in this war fighting against communistes villegar and ofcourse soviet union was there just behinde the scene with the communistes villeger and u.s.a loses this war against vietnam and the wining was kind for soviet union system against there bitter enemy u.s.a vietnams cost u.s.a about 50.000 to 70.000 solder wer killed from the amercans and almost 2 million people die from vietnam people but mostly was innocent not fighters.and this caused u.s.a first defete in the new history and scandal in politicse.back to the middle east u.s.a helps her ally isreal with all powers till the year 1973 when egypt and syria attackes isreal in surprising war to take back there occupied land that isearl occupie it 1967 and the war give her resault on the egyptian side only and egyptian army won the war and reback almost his land from isrealian and thats the first defete to isreal since the declare there countrwas on the egyptian army hands.but the syrian fails to do same and isreal won on that side again her the 2 great powers shows on the action field u.s.a hurry to help her ally isreal coz the huge loses egypt made in her so they open the amercan weapons storge for isreal without limit even they give isreal the most newest weapons that even the amercan army didnt have it yet.but that wasent enough they send solders too to fight with isreal against egypt and after the war they claim that the solders was jews and u.s.a dont know anything about them coz they left there platons and join isreal without permission.in same time soviet union wasent giving same aid to his allys the arabian countrys coz that egypt won her war but syria couldnt win.but after the war was everything clear that how much u.s.a aid for isreal.since the 50's of this centry the oil was discoverd in the arabian countrys almost the countrys was floating on oil.so this area become so important for the west.and go away to cuba and there was another rouand betwen u.s.a and soviet union but this time was so dengrous rouand coz it was about to start nuclear war betwen both of them when cuba convince soviet union to putt nuclear missles against u.s.a but in last second god was mercyfull to all and it finished but this mattre gives u.s.a and amercan people alram that soviet union is capable to reach them easly or like they say that soviet union was in ther back yardso the cold war was runing all over the world.

9/11spical view(1)

today the 6th memory for 9/11 attackes in u.s.a since this day the muslims becomes targets for all kindof attackes and accusations with reason and withoutin this attackes dies in it almost 3 thousand innocent in it but what after this attackes dies more than 1million and half from innocent muslims and thousands personed in all over the world with only accusation thats they r terrorists or giving help to terrorists or related to terrorists all countrys find it great chance to get ride of persons they dont want all under u.s.a commands.lets start again 9/11 attackes who declare his resbonsbility of it(alqaeda) say we did it and its muslim then muslims who did it thats was the first shoot and the world become wild against muslims till bush declare starting of war against terror.lets go years back till the world war 2.in the nauture of humans that they cant live without enamy enamy makes them live working hard fearing of the enamy give there blood much enrgy .in this while was nazism the enamy hetler was the enamyby the all ugly in he and all crimes he do and his crazy ideas who leads him to the end of his live and the defeat the world start to change the old powers withdraw a side and other powers take the place.united states of amerca and the soviet union.u.s.a and u.s.s.r those r the leaders of the new world those the new powers who free the world from the great evil.nazism and defeat it and give the world new hope but those 2 powers is so diffrant.capitalism.communism 2 diffrant systems and against each other in everything so they much clash both.after they won the worry everyone of them starts to try extend his powers in other countrys to take it under there wing and coz that the world divided to 2 teams one with capitalism and the other with communismand the cold war starts first shoot was in korea war and divided to 2 countrys north korea is communist and south korea is capitalist.and the both countrys keep on doing this to aid the other countrys enamy to take thim under her wing.soviet union and his system takes all eastern eroupe and some countrys in latin amerca and in asia nad africa.and some other with the capitalist with .u.s.a and her system.and so little try to be neutral.years go and the cold war get more wild its now the turn on the middle east and arab countrys.the middle east have his own problims.palstine the holly place for all religion his the open wound in all arab hearts and his makes resault for everything now.palstine since the beging is arabian country build by some arabian tribes called (yibossines) build it 4thousand years before the christ birth so its arabin country since the start not jews like they claim coz jews tribes only enter it 1300 year before the christ birth.anyway all this time palstine is arabic place till 1948 before that age britsh was occupied palstine since1918 and was in 1917 something called belfore promise to the jew to give them palstine to build country there with no care of the arabs there all this years palstine was under english occupied and jews start go there from all arouand the world little by little without anyone notice to build there jewsh country in the year of 1948 the britsh end there occupition to palstine in same moment jews declare there country there on few places of palstine not all of it and the stragle start from this moment.

iwant die today

today all my sadness come again today iwant die today
all my wounds opens today all my graves open today
today isaw her pic with him today isaw both of them
today my heart lost everything today icant find anything
why igo there why why isaw the pics why why im doing that
why ilove her and she didnt love me why why idesirve that why
what ido in my life to get that puinshment why
why im that weake why why my tears falls down on her why
why istill love her while shes with another why
why ilove her and she never think in me why why
why icant kill myself and rest from all that why
oh god only if wasent forrbidn ikill myself now to rest forever
igive her my life my soul what iget brokinheart
destroyed life no future no love what iget is big zero
maybe coz im bigger zero in this life so idont desirve more
iwas starting to get peace with myself just start but now
now all gone now isaw her pics with him now ireally want die
idont want this life anymore idont want it why ilive in live
im nothing in it nothing for others nothing for the one ilove
and big nothing for myself im biggest nothing on earth
oh god please help me icant stand that icant iswear icant
idont want desobey u but icant stand anymore
im so weake so weake .
ihate the day iknow her.ihate the day italk to her
ihate the day isaw her .ihate my self but icant hate her
coz icant stop love her icant just icant
ihate today ihate who take her from me
ihate this net ihate everything ihate my self
but cant hate her icant and cant stop loving her
so better thing idie iwant to die
yes today isaw her pics with him so
today iwant to die

when tears talk

when tears talk.............
every thing quiet.air be quiet
sun be quiet.universe be quiet when it come
light desappear step by step
vesion tottaly lacking
and no one exist only him
when tears talk
tear drop conquer...but it make conditionmust be more wounds and qonquers till ifall
common fall down.theres allot more of pain
even if it be diffrance in named
but u only stay a tear
when tears talk
makes u roll on urself ..searching of a breatht
rying to know's and feel
maybe u can taste .meaning of pleased life
but it strangles u
made betwen u and happines a space of sepration
and u touch the mirage
when tears talk
steals ur passport to life
like u never live it befor
just living for what called by tears
and stay count and count
how many drop falls today...what about
tomorrow and day after tomorrow and so on
and is't enough to erase whats sinks
when tears talk
no one more hounst than that tears
you try ..search of life
search of living among ur environment..
with taste and color and smell
and uwake without all that.
but she only tell u...in the right time
of what miss from ur mind
maybe u find comfrt after she fall
when tears talk
man can qonquer any other by what he have
of power and authority
but one drop from the tears
enough to melt mountines of omnipotencing this man
when tears talk...............

shock then unconsciousness(2)

iwakeup now istille feel not well why idont know
iheard voice saying thank god he finaly wakeup
ihardly open my eyes to see who's talking but
my view wasent clear so ididnt recognize the voice
and the room im in ithought im in my room but
no its not ifeel its diffrant ifeel uncomfrtable
something wrong few minutes things start to clear
im in diffrant room and iknow now where im
im in hospitel ican smell the medcin smell arouand me
and isee anurse and doctor oh its my doctor friend
iwant ask him what happin why im here but idont have
will to talk ijust dont want talk so imove my hand only
he say thank god what u feel now i move my head
saying im not good he ask why idont talk so isay
idont want talk to anyone and please no one ask me anything
he say u came yestrday and u was unconscious for 21 hours
and ur blood pressure was unbelivable u lucky that ur strong body stand it
whats happin to u makes u like that?ijust stare with no response
then he open the door to my family to come when they come
with tears in there eyes ifall again unconscious...........
how many days idont know im not in comma no but idont know
iknow and feel what happining arouand me and ieven
hear what they say iknow now isleep most of the day
and iwake only for minutes iknow that doctors forrbid
any to visit me and im in serious condition now but ifeel
im not well yes but not seriously ifeel its not that bad
ifind that many times im awake but i make myself sleep
or pretend im sleep yes iwas doing that
days pass and doctor say no improvment in my case
now icant eat ilost all my appetite to eat some times
iwant eat but icant icant beer it idont want eat just drink water
and smoke cegaret without anyone see me in the night istill have
few cegarets in my pocket ifeel strange all ifeel now that idont care
idont care of anything at all life or death me my family ijust dont care
iwounder why everybody so worry im not in dengrous why they say that
ifeel weake yes but not denger they say ilost my will in life
yes but that not dengrous yes im not willing to live anymore
but how this can effect my helth ijust dont care of this life anymore
how long im there idont know ifeel long enough but iwant know
but when iwant ask icant ifind my tounge wont move wont ask
itake allot of medcin for what idont know iheard allot of
expressions arouand me means serious things and saying things
idont know ok ifeel now by something ifeel im getting more weaker
more than ithink icant even think good why that whats happining to me
now all isee in my eyes is my grave prepare to me but do im ready
idont know and idont think so yes ifeel that now death approache me
ok iwanted allot before maybe its time for it hope people remember me
after idie and say good things about me idont care if they cry
just want them remember me coz ithink iwas good to everyone
isleep now maybe ican rest who knows maybe icant wake at all
when iwake ifind allot arouand me and ifeelt m body aching and feel
strange ijust stare at them why theres allot here idiscover that im sleep or in
unconscious for many days just wake for moment then icontinue
i discover more now the doctors say they give my family 10 days is danger if
i pass this days ibe ok if ididnt pass it very dengrous things well happin and could
cause death and all was the reason that my body resest the medcation
and ilost my will in living so that no improvment and all going to worse
but now im awake that means im ok and italk with my family too means
im more ok and doctor say finaly my body stop resesting and accept the medcin
maybe its not my time yet who knows but inside me istill dont have the will
for living iknow that and ifeel it so clear ihate this life ifeel idont
belonge to it my place not her where idont know just ifeel that
days pass in routine very boring routine ihate that really ido but im helpless
if ihave little strength iwant to run to escape from all that
medcin in time eating in time all in time time ifeel like im big pharmacy now
from the huge medcin itake .im ok now all say my strong body helps allot
so im ok iwant go out but doctors have another opinion istill have depression
imust heal from it so they decided imust go to another hospitel for depression
maybe im gone be crazy or im already crazy and they sent me to menaly hospitel
im going now there in the car isee the street was long time ididnt see
ifeelt sad really im the active person who go from here to there and traville allot
and most of time in outgoing ibe like that?anyway im in the way now
it called green vally hospitel for deprssion and another things well ifeelt better
coz it dosent look like hospitel it look like hotel smal resort or something
like that and when im there ican use internet and anything iwant even ican go out to buy cigarettes well iknow they cant heal me iknow that very well but idont want argue coz ialready talk very little idont want talk to anyone so all iwell do iwell respond to them
so make them think im ok so days well pass and igo away
so all ido is making the programs the give to me and watch tv then iuse internet
and now day after tomorrow ican go home and my plan worked
they think im 90%heald from the depression isucces in make them
think they help me but they not what ifeel still same
yes im same now like before igot sick nothing happin to me
im same ifeel same like before and no one can change that
no one can help me coz ifaild to help myself
my feeling my love my sorrow my sadness
well stay for ever with the deprssion till idie
coz itake my descion to be like that and stay
like that till idie coz icant live without her